you guys had money management problems before you got this money so you got this money not knowing how to manage money and you got this money and you use the skills you didn’t have and you mismanaged it you also distort reality and lie to yourselves because you are victims you look at everything as being a victim and so I wanted to see what reality was just to give you a reality check so I did a breakdown first off the settlement was a million in $33,000 correct yes sir you didn’t get a million in $33,000 to begin with so first off you start out with a number in your head that is fictional because you spent five hundred and thirty thousand dollars of that on your attorneys percentage and on medical so you didn’t have a million thirty three to begin with you had about six hundred or something and you said she ran through all of your money I broke it all down we did an accounting you spent four hundred thirty four thousand three hundred dollars she spent sixty six thousand dollars you joint purchases were three thousand dollars that was on a wedding so all of this money you got a million dollar settlement and she blew through it the truth is you didn’t get a million dollar settlement and she didn’t blow through it you got about six hundred grand you spent four hundred thirty four thousand three of it she spent sixty six that’s the reality I did the math I’m an idiot I I guess it sounds better when you scream and it’s a million dollars yeah well you you got your off-road vehicle and you punched up your truck and you got your family RV and you I mean you you got a lot of toys but you put all of this into depreciating assets and you apparently got sixty six thousand dollars worth of teeth breast augmentation and flip flops according to him that’s a lot of flip flops but that’s not a material amount of this settlement so if you’re a gold digger you’re not a very good one you know the actual settlement was 1 million and fifty thousand dollars and we totaled all of this up here and it gets pretty close it’s a million thirty three thousand three hundred dollars so you apparently spilt another 17 grand somewhere okay where’s the family RV now where’s the car while you gone what is your point I guess I’m just bent that the money’s gone and it didn’t go to better places yeah and you know who you’re mad at myself damn right I want to add to the conversation estate management attorney and Margaret Carosa now she is the author of love and money protecting yourself from angry exes wacky relatives con artists and inner demons and boy are we talking about all of those things in this situation and Margaret we’re talking Arizona here if divorce is filed for here well what’s the situation well Arizona is one of our community property states which means any assets that come to either party during the marriage are presumed to be 50/50 however in this case the date of the settlement was before the marriage now that doesn’t mean that Bob is totally off the hook because in court in a marital dissolution proceeding Carol you would have the ability to bring forth evidence that you improved the house and therefore transformed what would be a separate asset of Bob’s into a marital asset but we really want to avoid having that be determined in court because you’re going to have a ton of legal fees a ton of heartache and more delays so I really hope that one of the things the two of you think about doing would be a post-nuptial agreement where you kind of hammer out what would be the bottom line in the event that the hoped for reconciliation doesn’t work out